sunday

At $25.99 a piece, you too can be ridiculous.

hello kitty bike tire treads

I had a discussion with Mom before going to bed. It began with me asking how Moses fit into the timeline of the bible, and going back to the whole he was hallucinating in the desert, and I eventually reached the conclusion that the bible is a work of fiction written by people who had heard stories secondhand, that people who live in the desert are crazy because they suffered from dehydration and desperation in search of a better place, Christianity is based on a hoax, and God does not exist. It was a depressing moment. Most children have that moment of revelation when they figure out Santa Clause or the tooth dairy isn’t real. I never had that, but I have the realization that there is no one ultimate being who controls the universe. I’ve denounced all things religious and given up my blind faith for something more logical like the forces of nature. Wearing my cross I got from Vatican city made me feel dirty and I had to take it off that instant. I don’t even have the desire to get married in a church anymore, which at least will save me a lot of money, maybe just a grand reception. It saddens me that so many people would put so much faith in something that has absolutely no credibility, on something that is built purely on heresay.

Of course, as my punishment perhaps, I get the stomach flu and vomit for half the night. I sleep through most of Saturday with barely enough energy to stand. On top of that I get a fever in the afternoon and Mom suggests I go downstairs to walk around and eat something for dinner. I’m barely able to stand and she wants me to walk and eat, I feel like I’d need a wheelchair if i want to leave the hotel room. The minestrone soup didn’t help too much, but I felt a teeny bit better after the oatmeal back in the room. Well, after my fourth Cypro pill in the last 12 hours, I decided to pray to god to spare me from any more pain, and coincidentally, I started to heal. (I’m not reclaiming my faith just yet.) At least I wasn’t having stomach pains and could fly without having to go to the bathroom every 15 minutes.

How I felt after Egypt and not being able to eat food until five days later, courtesy of Pat Roby

We sadly make our departure from Le Meridien in Dahab, traveling by bus to Saint Catherine Monastery. It was uneventful, even the monestary which was filled with Grecian relics and icons we had already seen last year in Greece. Two items of note: well of Moses and the burning bush, which looked more like a tree and is not even in its original location. I twas moved from the basilica, but it is said that the roots still survive in the basilica. I’m starting to think the whole Christian faith is a hoax.

The St. Catherine hotel is just as shabby. The refrigerator sits on four wobbly legs to its side as if it couldn’t bear its own weight and isn’t even plugged in. There’s no TV and I’ll be lucky if I can get the room light on and working. At least there is a screen door so I can let some fresh air in. It’s very quiet, as I have the room to myself and hopefully will be able to finish my BAH interview questions. I’m slightly hesitant about sleeping in the beds; they look antiquated and unused as though they’ve been here for hundreds of years, just collecting dust. Maybe I’ll pull out the sleeping bag.

I have a rather purple bruise on my nose from my scuba mask. It hadn’t been properly sitting on my head and I kept getting water in it. But now that we’re in the middle of nowhere, people are asking us for some of our food. I can’t decide if I should eat my sandwich now or if I should save it for later. Kevin already took one of my chocolate donuts and asked for a bite of my Parisian baguette. I’ll have to be sneaky about eating it while hiking.

The climb up Mt. Sinai was deceiving (to me, at least). I t was a good thing Mom and Vincent didn’t come, because they wouldn’t have even made it 1/8 up. Anna estimated the entire trip to be 10km, but I didn’t expect it to be so steep. Joanna said the end had 700 steps that we had to climb to get to the top. With nothing but dirt and rocks, it was a very strenuous climb. Rebecca took a camel which brought her to the beginning of the 700 steps, and halfway through, Taylor spotted a camel, borrowed 10 LE from Kevin, and rode it about 100 feet. He totally got ripped off, but he said it was enough to rejuvenate his tired muscles. Kathleen was the first to reach the end, followed by Anna (who, by the way, hikes 12-18 km once a week and is “retired”–she wouldn’t tell us how old she is when Elaine asked), and I was the third. The whole way up I was trying to drink my water bottles so I wasn’t carrying so much dead weight, and I even ate my apple, but it was hard to breathe and chew at the same time when I was already out of breath.

We reached the top around 4 p.m. and took pictures while waiting for the sun to set. While it is amazing to be that high and imagine how quiet it is if you were alone, the sunset wasn’t all that great; sure as hell doesn’t beat sunsets in Maui (or by the beach). The way down was much faster, only took one hour, and I caught up to Taylor at the front with our local guide with my mag lite. Good thing I had it otherwise I would have been falling all over the place. At one point near the bottom, Taylor and I came up behind two old Taiwanese tourists who didn’t have a light. It was pitch dark by now, and upon my arriving light, the lady said, “Oh thank you for the light!” But Taylor and I were in such a hurry to get to the bottom that we just walked by them and paid no attention. Taylor later said “I think that was our test from God on Mt Sinai, and I think we just failed.”

When we reached the bottom, we sat and waited for the others to arrive. Kyle and Joanna arrived next, followed by good Samaritan Elaine who was guiding the pair we had passed up. Turns out, the elder guy was a priest. Oh well, their fault for not being prepared. Apparently Kyle and Joanna passed them too, but the Taiwanese didn’t say anything to the. Probably because Taylor and I set such a bad precedent.

I can see how being at the top of the mountain could be quiet and peaceful and give one lots of time to reflect. I still think Christianity is a hoax. After all, we have no proof Moses was up there, I mean he could have only gone half way up. And the ten commandments cold have been something he pulled out of his ass versus the words of God. I’m becoming more atheist the longer I stay out here, which I think is the opposite of the intent. Well, I made my pilgrimage to Mt. Sinai, how many Christians can say they did that?

Coming down the mountain in complete darkness made me remember how beautiful the night sky is. I could clearly see all the stars and the milky way interrupting its path. I wish I had someone to share that moment with, but then it made me realize, and reinforce, how alone I am in this life. There really is n one who can take care of me like me. I have long ago accepted the fact that I may be alone for the rest of my life, to wander in solitude, but maybe that’s what it really means to be at one with God, to find that peace and be content.

The long path up to Mt. Sinai

Sunset

We had a delicious breakfast buffet consisting of donuts and other baked goods. The other stuff didn’t look too appealing. afterwards I went by the water and collected my red sand and signed up at the Poseidon Diving Center for a day of scuba diving. It began with a lesson with my instructor Stephen and since I was comfortable with the ocean, we did the basics in the Gulf of Aqaba instead of the pool. The scuba gear is really heavy and on top of that you have to wear weights to hold you down while swimming in the water. I had a little trouble with my buoyancy in the water but otherwise I did a good job apparently. The morning session was just learning the basics while the afternoon session we actually went diving and looked at fishes. I was hoping to see a turtle or ray but we saw mostly lionfishes, puffers, and maybe groupers. I don’t know, I needed a map down there.

I was famished after my four hours of diving and had another Parisian sandwich and strawberry guava juice followed by some sort of coffee gelatin dessert. My hard work and eating nearly put me in a coma, so I took a nap in the big, round wicker chair by the lower pool. I am still thoroughly exhausted and would love to stay until Sunday, but we drive to St. Catherine tomorrow to climb Mt. Sinai, where Moses received the ten commandments from God, which I’m starting to think is a complete hoax. Imagine wandering that mountainous desert for a hundred days in that awful heat, don’t you think you’d start to go a little crazy an hallucinate? I think I’ve just renounced my Catholic faith.

Otherwise it’s been a very uneventful, but relaxing day in Dahab. I hope to come back to this hotel some day.

Alas! We arrive to the third page of the itinerary. Breakfast was served downstairs withe usual buffet fare, but since the hotel was filled with tourists, there was a long line to get into the restaurant.

To arrive in Sharm El Sheikh, we took a ferry across the Red Sea. The waves were so choppy you could see water splashing well over the windows. The room smelled of cigarette smoke, but I wasn’t sure if it was the room, or my jacket, or the people sitting around me. I actually felt a little sick and just tried to focus on breathing and finding fresh air. My best effort resulted in napping.

Once we landed at Sharm El Sheikh, we collected our luggage and proceeded to the bus for our two-hour drive to Dahab. While I read Kevin’s book all the way, “The Road” the deserted black road wound through the steep, craggy mountains that burned red. Hah, how ironic. Anyways, the road past Le Meridien was nothing but a dirt path in the desert. It was remotely located at the end of the road, looking very unlike the self-proclaimed “Happy Village Hotel.” I’m really glad we decided on Le Meridien, which we checked into after dropping everyone off to their secluded doom. If I had to imagine how pharaohs and their queens lived in their palaces, I would imagine a place exactly like this. The white washed buildings, open-air outdoor spaces with colorful canopies, and the Gulf of Aqaba in front of you. Our deluxe room is astounding! Complete with an Arabian deep purple ceiling with red lighting around the recessed trim, Asian-inspired wooden screens throughout, a large soaking tub, and a sunflower shower head, and even an outdoor shower in the back patio for rinsing off after the beach. After a long soak in the tub and a quick rinse in the shower, I wrapped myself in the Egyptian cotton robe provided by the hotel and relaxed in the lounge chair in the back patio under the canopy. Needless to say, I was completely worthless and couldn’t lift a finger. The hotel staff brought us a fruit basket along with some cookies, which left us rather full along with our late lunch. Too stuffed to eat dinner, we lounged in the hotel room enjoying the comforts of luxury, finally!

Le Meridien Dahab had only been open a month earlier and upon arriving someone brought us apple juice (freshly squeezed) and cookies. They also presented each of us a necklace with “Meridien” inscribed on one side in English and on the other side in hieroglyphics.

A rocky and mountainous desert…no sand dunes!

Le Meridien in Dahab

The taxi ride to Flobater Hotel was pretty miserable. Mom was having a fit because the taxi driver wanted to charge 10LE per person instead of in total. And then he tried to drop us off somewhere else before the hotel, which ticked off Mom even more. She assumed the taxi driver knew exactly where we wanted to go and he was just trying to ditch us somewhere else. I’m not quite sure if he really knew where we wanted to go because nobody seems to understand “Flobater,” probably because it’s not a major hotel like Sheraton (everyone understood when we said that). Now Mom is going to ask George to pick us up wherever go, which I don’t necessarily agree with. On one hand, we signed up to stay at these not-so-good hotels so if we want to stay elsewhere, it’s our responsibility to get to the tour group’s location; on the other hand, if George wants to be a good tour director, he’ll pick us up or drop us off at our other hotel. After all, the customer is always right. (Amazingly, George agreed to Mom’s demands.)

We traveled by convoy to Hurghada, about a 3.5-hour drive. In 1997, there was an attack on tourists in Luxor near Hatshepsut’s Temple, so now tourists have to travel in convoy’s with lightly armed guards, which seems counterintuitive because our schedule is more predictable and we’ve made ourselves an easy and large target to terrorists. Better to travel by train, it seems. We had one bathroom break where all the buses stopped in the middle of nowhere. All the tourists were out of the buses using the WC, some taking pictures of the baby goats standing on sitting camels, and a very loud man yelling, “ICE CREAM IIICE CREEEAAAM ICE CREAM!” The damned place looked like a carnival/circus. I promptly made my way back to our van and continued reading my overpriced book, which I’m already more than halfway through.

Hurghada looks nice. Well, the Red Sea looks nice, not sure about the actual city. I can hear the horns hoking outside and Celine Dion’s “Because You Loved Me” blasting from the pool downstairs. My balcony affords a small view of the aqua blue sea, though I don’t know how warm the water will be. It’s relatively cool in Hurghada, maybe around 70, and the pool is frigid (probably like in Aswan), so I don’t know how favorable the beach will be.

The road to Hurghada was the bumpiest I’ve ever been on. If I positioned my back against the wall sideways to the seat, and rested my head against the window with my jaw slightly slacked, I could hear and feel my teeth chatter, and for a while it felt like a face massage. At times I could barely read m;y book because it was so bumpy (but I was also sitting in the last row). The convoy, according to Kevin’s Egypt guidebook, is a joke. It more or less became a race to see which tour bus could get in the front, through I saw no point to that since we were supposed to travel together. Although, that probably does encourage faster driving, and hence, arriving at our destination sooner.

Since I couldn’t find Mom and Vincent, I hung out with Kevin, Audrey, Elaine, Leticia, Kyle, and Joanna. We went to a Mandarin/Lebanese Restaurant down the street, which took an hour and half to get lunch. There was some mass confusion, as usual, while ordering our food because Elaine and I were sharing a kebob dish, and there was more confusion with our separate bills. I had a baba ganouch which reminded me of green salsa, and Kyle and Joanna ordered some…vines? I didn’t like it and am much too Americanized (or is it picky?) to try anything new like that. Perhaps I’m too mainstream like that? I definitely do not go off the beaten path with alternatives. I guess that just makes me average.

Motzenpick. I think that’s the Swiss ice cream we had in Sheraton Luxor. They had a full ice cream menu of all the flavors and then some. I should have skipped entree and stuck with the ice cream, since it would have been much more delicious. After our late lunch we headed to the hotel’s beach. I guess there’s a sister hotel that’s right on the water, whereas we’re staying a black away. The Red Sea wasn’t too cold, probably the same temperature as the pool in Sheraton Luxor. We swam out and stood on a rock and hung out for a while until the breeze made it too chilly to stay in the water any longer. There wasn’t really any “sand” on the beach, more like very small, rounded pebbles everywhere. The pebbles were red, white, and brown which gave the appearance of red sand. The water was surprisingly clear and you could see the bottom even if you were out pretty deep. I wish I had grabbed some sand with me for my collection, but I didn’t take a bottle at the time for it.

Dinner was at a local seafood restaurant. I wasn’t too hungry so I thought I would order some crepe, but the waiter denied me because there were too many people ordering dinner at the time (more like, 10 other people). So I thought I would just order dessert instead for my main course, to which he said, “I’ll come back later.” What a dick. Needless to say, I didn’t leave him any tip and left unsatisfied again after the meal. Mom gave me some of her spaghetti, but the sauce was bland and watered-down.

After dinner, we went to a bakery where everyone bought sponge cakes and Mom bought six for Kevin’s 30th bithrday. We headed back to one of the restaurant’s in the hotel and while they drank, I sat around, as usual. I did play a game of pool with Kevin after Elaine and narrowly won. Victory is mine!

The Red Sea in Hurghada

One of the major nuisances about Egypt is that everyone smokes everywhere. And i mean everywhere. It could be our bus driver smoking in the bus, other tourists standing near you, locals smoking in the shops, in the restaurants, in the hotels, everywhere! I’m not used to it because of the no-smoking policy we have when indoors. That’s the worst, when people smoke in an enclosed or confined space. I’ll probably get lung cancer at the end of the trip from all the second-hand smoking.

I’m also quite sure that no one except our tour group is staying at this Flobater Hotel. It’s pretty empty in the reception and the lights aren’t even on in the part of the reception where I’m sitting. My mom has decided to check into Le Meridien in Dahab for fear we’ll die from the food and lock of hot showers.

It’s also interesting to see military posts every mile or so. There will be a roof on four posts with a vehicle and armed guards underneath. I wonder what their purpose is aside from making sure a terrorist doesn’t attack. Someone in the group told me that young men must join the military and each serve 30 minutes each day doing some sort of guarding. I wonder what they do during the rest of the day. I also wonder how families generate an income. Is it strictly tourism? Because I see men sitting in cafes eating and drinking while women and children are at home and school, respectively. Well, if felling souvenirs brings home the dough, although the other night when we went to get pizza for dinner, we saw a group of people lined up outside the building next to us waiting for their food. I called it the welfare line.

We begin the day at 7:30 a.m. with a horse-drawn carriage ride to Karnak Temple. We spend almost three hours there taking pictures and wandering the massive complex. I notice some of the hieroglyphics are not carved into the stone, but the stone around it is cut so it looks embossed. That must have taken a lot longer than the usual engraved hieroglyphics. Near the Sacred Pool, where the pharaohs and priests bathed before praying (an act of cleansing and purifying) is a scarab beetle statue where you walk around once for good luck, three times for marriage, and seven times for children. I walked around it once.

After Karnak Temple we resume our horse-drawn carriage to a jewelry shop full of gold, silver, diamonds, and gemstones. I made no purchase and told Mom not to spend $450 on a diamond-encrusted beetle on a gold chain. Kevin is trying to purchase a single 1.25 carat diamond, color D, for Audrey, but I don’t think they sell loose stones.

I think some of the stones were pieced back together at Karnak Temple. It’s too bad it’s in such bad shape, I think the Mayan ruins look better than some of the temples we’ve seen (granted they weren’t as old). One piece looked like it was cemented back to the original block of stone because I could see the fracture lines from the smaller pieces that fell off. On a different note, Taylor decided to stay in the hotel again today to continue his recuperation. He didn’t miss much anyways since he already attended the Sound and Light Show the other night, which is a complete waste of our 75LE.

I’m starting to reach my seven-day threshold hanging out with my mom. At least we’re traveling to Hurghada and I can have my own room again. That God for peace and tranquility.

Forgot to mention: on our carriage ride to Karnak Temple the driver kept asking–no, harassing, that Mom tip “the horse” one or two Egyptian pound for her breakfast. Our horse, named Cinderella, was also pregnant and going to give birth in two months. Although I didn’t see this, one of the other group’s carriage’s wheel fell off and their driver fell to the ground, which I would have laughed if I saw for myself because I’m a bastard like that. Anyways, our driver was trying to make chit-chat and kept asking if I was married. I should have said yes, but at least I told him I had an American boyfriend. Who the hell wants to marry an Egyptian and live in Egypt anyways? Besides, Egyptian men are allowed to have as many wives as they want, so long as they have the financial means to support each family equally. Our carriage driver also joked that his carriages is an Egyptian Ferrari. Hah hah, funny man.

Back at the Sheraton for lunch. I ordered the BBQ burger again, and actually got the BBQ sauce this time (guess the waiter forgot yesterday). After lunch we went swimming and I took a nap by the pool. It would have been more pleasant without all those damn flies. But at least no mosquitoes. Since there was no more chocolate ice cream left, I think I got the last scoop yesterday, I ordered an espresso something. Reminded me of Starbuck’s Java Chip ice cream that Karl always gets.

We have a 3.5-hour drive to Hurghada tomorrow so I went tot eh Sheraton shopping area to find a book. I should have bargained for my Agatha Christie mystery (”Death on the Nile”! how appropriate), as I was severely overcharged for a $5 book–75LE! This book better last me the entire four hours of our bus ride. As usual I got on the internet for a little bit and there was a guy at the computer next to me this time. he was checking his stock on the Google Finance page and started yelling “fuck!” about twenty times. The market had a correction Thursday and Friday and I guess he lost a lot of money. I’m not worried because I know Google and Apple will go back up.

I didn’t each too much for dinner because of my large lunch. I ordered Chinese Spring Rolls, but they tasted more like Egyptian spring rolls…go figure. I didn’t like the peas and beans combo in it, but Mom packed my leftovers for tomorrow in case she got hungry.

We’re almost on the last page of our itinerary! Hopefully the next couple of days will go by quickly. We made reservations at Le Meridien in Dahab and hopefully it won’t be too much of a pain to get there. I wonder if the rest of the tour group thinks we’re a bunch of prisses or envy us. I feel like we should man up…but Starwood Hotels are so nice!!

Colonnades at Karnak Temple

Embossed hieroglyphics (versus engraved)

I am not on vacation. I do not wake up at 5:20 in the morning, unless I am going to the airport for my vacation.

We taxied to Flobater Hotel to meet up with the rest of the crew. We took a motor boat to the west bank of the Nile, and from there we rode ass for an hour to the Valley of the Kings.

The first tomb we saw was Ramses II. The hieroglyphics on the wall are inscriptions to protect the pharaoh’s passage to the next world after death. The colors are vividly preserved, although with 100 visitors in the tomb at once, it made it difficult to breathe and hence, hard to focus on the walls. The second tomb, however, was much less crowded. Because of its location you had to climb two flights of metal stairs followed by several more flights descending underground. The main chamber was painted a magnificent blue on the ceiling and the top of the wall with hieroglyphic drawings spanning the lower half of the wall. I’m amazed that the lines they’ve drawn separating each column and the top half from the bottom half of the wall are so straight! Imagined they had some sort of ruler to use as a guide. The hieroglyphics in this temple are unlike any I’ve seen before; instead of the large, filled-in pictures, these looked more like stick figure drawings. We had an option to see King Tut’s tomb but you have to pay an extra 80 LE to go in. They also limited visitation to 1,000 persons per day. We opted for a free tomb and went to visit Ramses XI, which looked the same as Ramses II.

I forgot to mention that on the donkey ride to the Valley of the Kings, my mom got thrown off the donkey. Twice. Serves her right, because she was the one bragging about how she rode camels in China and mules in Santorini and was instructing other people that you have to relax so you don’t get thrown off, and yet she was the only one who fell off her donkey. Twice.

Since Hatshepsut was voted down by the group, we made our 30-minute donkey journey to the stone shop, where we looked at stone carvings. There was a whole section dedicated top phosphorus statuettes, which meant they glowed in the dark. Funny, they only carved fertility god statuettes in the phosphorus rock (I thought about getting a small version for the boys). We rode in front of Hetshepsut Temple and went on to the free temple (as in, it wasn’t an optional tour and we didn’t have to pay extra), called Habu Temple. This templed was pretty magnificent and at one point in history was a church, converted by the Christians. The carvings on the walls were deeply set and the paint still maintained the colors (most visible were the blues). Near the entrance of the church were two smaller buildings, one of the right and one on the left. The one of th left had an interesting layout with hallways going around a center room. These hallways were dark and filled with more hieroglyphics, with light entering the building by small squares cut into the ceiling. I was wary at first sight, but braved the dark passageway all the way around.

Kevin & Co. decided to remain on the west bank and visit Hatshepsut Temple. The remainder took “local transportation” back to the shore for our motor boat across the Nile. I thought I was going to die in the back of that truck because of all the dust and carbon monoxide I was inhaling.

We returned to the Sheraton for a late lunch consisting of mixed grill (Mom), fish and chips (Vincent) and BBQ burger (moi). Of course when I read “BBQ” I assumed it was the sauce, but turns out they were referring to the cooking style (on a grill). I also had a “Little Engineer” to drink , which was a blend of pineapple, orange juice, and grenadine. After lunch, I had a scoop of chocolate ice cream in a waffle cone that was hand pressed in the machine right in front of you. At least you know it’s fresh. Vincent had “Vanilla Dream” and Mom had pistachio. After lunch, Vincent and I went for a swim in the non-freezing pool (it was very pleasant actually).

Today has been the best day thus far because I wasn’t stuck sweating and smelling on a felucca with seven other of my relatives. It was more adventurous riding the donkeys, definitely thought the entire trip would be more physically demanding like today. Ironically, Kathleen and Taylor wanted to do the eight-hour donkey tour, but Kathleen was nauseous since the morning and Taylor didn’t come out of the room. A lot of people have been getting sick and/or having stomach problems, except me. Good thing I ate McDonald’s everyday in October to train for crappy Egyptian food. At least we’re on the second page of the itinerary! I’m rather excited, because this means our trip is almost over.

Passing Hatshepsut Temple

my donkey that I rode for the day

The entrance to Habu Temple

I should probably go into detail on Egyptian driving habits. The roads are fairly normal, painted lines, signs, and traffic lights. While in United States these are considered laws, they are mere recommendations and guidelines in Egypt. No one actually obeys the traffic lights–I’ve seen drivers run plenty of red lights–and worst of all, no one drives in their lanes. It is common to straddle two lanes, even when the second lane is for oncoming traffic. With this, comes the horn honking and headlight flashing. Even at night, headlights aren’t used unless you’re in a rural area with absolutely no street lighting. Otherwise, drivers flash their headlights to notify other drivers to make way for them (equivalent to flashing the high beams). But oh yes, the honking. People are constantly honking to tell the driver in front, “Hey I’m behind you and I want to pass you!” This goes hand-in-hand with the driving-all-over-the-street-while-disregarding-lines attitude. And they call ME an aggressive driver! Drivers tend to just move into any open space on the road, so long as it gets them to the front, regardless of whether they’re straddling multiple lanes or passing cars in the face of oncoming traffic. This doesn’t happen in suburban, rural, areas of Egypt. This was mos evident the first day we arrived in Cairo. It’s also hazardous how close to the other cars they get on the road. If not sheer luck, the Egyptian drivers are the most skilled I’ve seen so far.

Oy Vay. My mom is snoring so loud and it’s only her nap time…at 6:30 p.m. At least tomorrow we won’t have to wake up until 7:30 for our 8:30 departure to Karnak. The rest of the day should be pretty chill like today, spent by the pool, doing a little tanning. I think my arms got tan from the donkey rides, I just hope I don’t have some ridiculous Indiana farmer’s tan.

I think we started sailing again at 5:30 in the morning, but i was too warm huddled in my sleeping bag and went back to sleep. I probably finally woke up at 8a.m. because everyone else was awake and talking. We docked at our final destination and had breakfast on the felucca while waiting for our bus to pick us up.

We had a 2.5-hour drive to Luxor and the only thing everyone had on their mind was to pee in the bushes now or wait an hour for a bathroom along the way. Should have picked the bushes, because the bathrooms at a guard stop had brown residue everywhere and was completely inhabitable and filthy beyond belief–more like something you’d see in a poor, primitive country. Oh wait, I’m in Egypt.

Arrived at our hotel in Luxor around 11:30 a.m. and gunned for the bathroom. No toilet paper (not uncommon), but at least there was a toilet. My mom was pretty fed up with the way things were going, so the three of us left and went to the Sheraton for the next three nights. At least I had a burger and fries for lunch! And, even better, they had fast internet, which meant reserving two nights at Sheraton in Cairo for our return trip, checking my email, facebooking, and a little online shopping. Everyone’s having a sale! What a waste…at least I’m saving money, right?

Oh yeah, I think I have a mosquito bite on my right butt cheek. How unpleasant. So that makes 1 right butt cheek, 6 on top of my left hand, 2 on my left forearm, 1 on right forearm,1 on left calf, 1 right cheek on face, 1 right temple, 2 on right-side of neck, 1 on left cheek, and 2 along left jawline next to my ear, for a grand total of–oh wait, 2 on the bottom of my right foot–20 mosquito bites. Lucky me…

I like how all the hotel entrances have metal gate detectors and “officials” monitoring these gates, yet every time we walk through one, the damn thing starts beeping like mad and no one does anything. What’s the purpose of having them there at all? Simply for nuisance?

Well, I think now that I’ve finished reading my book, I’m going to have to spend more time writing in my journal to occupy myself. Currently, Mom and Vincent are taking their midday nap and I’ve got nothing to do. I suppose I can think about that Caesar Salad and club sandwich I’m going to eat for dinner. The rest of the day was supposed to be free time for wandering around Luxor. I think some were going for a camel ride at 3 p.m. followed by the Luxor Temple light and sound show at 6 p.m. Can’t decide if that’s going to be worth my effort or not.

My mistake. There was an optional tour to go to the Kom Ombo Temple on the way to Luxor, but nobody really wanted to go (except Kevin and Audrey), so majority voted to go straight to the hotel after disembarking the felucca. There is another optional Sound & Light show of Karnak Temple, “by horse-drawn chariot.” According to GAP Adventure, and really George’s itinerary, the show costs $27/person, or about 135 L.E./person; however, Sheraton hotel says it only costs 55 L.E./person, which means George is making a profit on all these optional tours, who by the way, is only 26 years old! Seriously, he looks like he’s 40.

Well I managed to drag my ass out of the hotel room and attend the Sound and Light Show at Karnak Temple. After some disastrous negotiation on behalf of my mom, we took a motor boat along the Nile to Karnak Temple, where I was nearly molested by 12-year-old boys. Had I not been so tired I would have decked the kid after his second feel.

I went into this show expecting great things like Vegas-styled laser shows and live performances. It was literally a sound (voices narrating) and light (different colored light bulbs shining onto the temple) show. And we had to walk through the temple during the first half–how interactive. It felt like this show was designed in the 1950s and they never bothered to change the program. Also, whoever wrote the script is a terrible writer. The narrations barely made nay sense.

The cab ride home was much better (as in no haggling) and I immediately went straight to dinner. The Caesar salad with chicken was alright, the sauce slightly different than what I’m used to, and the club sandwich Mom had had different bacon. But the french fries were good as usual. After dinner I wanted a little coffee but the waiter said you make it yourself at the buffet station. I went over to inspect the situation, thinking all I had to do was pour my own coffee, but instead i found a cappuccino machine and bags of ground instant coffee. Aside from grinding the coffee beans, I literally had to brew the coffee myself. Being the lazy fuck that I am, I sulked back to the table exclaiming that I wasn’t going to make my own coffee and gave up on the idea altogether.

I came to the conclusion that taking vacations like these are not fun anymore. They tend to be stressful, compared to my ideal tropical vacation where I sit next to the ocean for rive days and do nothing except eat, sleep and swim. Now that’s my kind of vacation! After Japan, I think Spain and Prague are going to have to wait. I may just opt for weekend trips to Paris or London, but as of now, I’m tired of always being on the go. One thing for sure: this is the last time I book a GAP Adventure tour.

Tomorrow, we go to the Valley of the Kings on donkeys.

The view from our room at the Sheraton Luxor.

The hotel that we ditched for Sheraton Luxor.